There was one piece that I’d kept off to the side. I was sure it didn’t fit. It wasn’t a big deal. It couldn’t possibly be the cause of so much anger and suffering. But I had tried every other piece already.

Even within our tight-knit group at 5WAVES, we struggle with language. We are trying to address something complex, with myriad facets and many possible variations, involving many people whose needs and wounds do not easily align.

When you think back to what you were like as a tween, around the ages of 10 to 12, what do you remember about yourself? ...

How does a parent tell a young child that their favorite cousin won’t be coming to visit any more? Or that their own sibling will be moving out of the home?

​What we did not realize is that the wounds of SSA had damaged our relationships with our daughters long ago — without us knowing anything about it.
 

Most children who have been sexually abused by a sibling don’t tell anyone until they are an adult–if at all...If you are a parent and your adult child has taken the immensely difficult step to share the long-held, devastating secret of a sexual experience with a sibling, it is crucial to take it seriously.

Alert, breathing, waiting.

Only she hears the quietest of footsteps.

No one else hears; does no one else have ears?

Why does no one else ever hear?

Unfortunately, the same features which make holidays and milestones special are what make them so painful when family relationships are broken.

I cannot hate you,

but I hate what you’ve done.

And I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to forgive you.

Our family is broken now.

And I can’t find the pieces I need to fix this...

What happens when your daughter discloses that her half-brother sexually abused her? I never in my wildest dreams imagined it could ever be a possibility. Does such a thing exist? 

This is going to be hard for you to believe but please keep reading! I know your secret, you are safe!
My name is Dale and I am your future husband....

I am a 16 year old female survivor of sibling sexual abuse...I hope you will find this blog helpful and know that if another child/teen was able to advocate for their own justice, you can do it too.

This is your Team Member description. Use this space to write a brief description of this person’s role and responsibilities, or add a short bio.

​I have written this impact statement to bring forth a different view as the parent of a victim and offender of sibling sexual abuse.